I used to have a little pink coin purse

I used to have a little pink coin purse. It was a smooth, almost silky plastic and shaped something like a very tiny bowling ball bag with tiny little handles. It zipped around the top and had a keychain attached to it. The purse was a souvenir my parents got for me in Florida, so it had the state’s name on it, and a picture of palm trees and a flamingo. I can’t tell you how old I was when I received it or exactly when I lost it.

I didn’t keep anything that would be considered valuable in that purse; probably a few pennies, maybe a pale pink plastic barrette in the shape of a bow. I remember that barrette, as it was almost the same shade as the purse, and I liked that. I also seem to recall two miniature licenses plates from Pennsylvania (where I was born and where we lived at the time). They were key chains too, and I attached them to the purse.

I remember that I used to keep the purse in the “junk drawer” of my dresser, then when we moved house, I kept it in a cardboard shoebox with a few other treasures. One of them was a Little Kiddle doll in a purple mouse outfit and another was a Little Kiddle Locket Doll. They aren’t the ones you see pictured. I do think I still have those, but I couldn’t lay my hands on them today and I probably shouldn’t have been surprised that I could Google image search and find their exact matches in seconds. If only it were that easy to find my coin
purse. Sigh.

I don’t know why the memory of that coin purse has stuck with me. I’m guessing someone with knowledge of the psychological sciences would have a theory. I wouldn’t call it an obsession. Years might go by and I don’t think of the purse. But then something will spark a memory. Or I’ll run across another box of stuff in my basement or my parent’s house, and think, “maybe it’s in there!” And I’ll dump out the contents, eagerly scanning for my little purse. But I’ve never found it. We didn’t move a lot, but we had a big move to St. Louis in 1976 and I recall a few things being lost. So chances are it was lost then, or was accidentally tossed out during a cleaning binge.

Is it a big deal that I used to have this sweet little coin purse and now I don’t? Of course not. But I do wonder why it will suddenly come to mind from time to time. I suppose it’s something as simple as the loss of childhood or loss of innocence or memories of a simpler time. A few years back I bought a wallet because it reminded me of the coin purse. It was plastic, trimmed in pink, and had fake stickers from vacation spots, including a flamingo for Florida. It’s fun to use that wallet on vacations, but it hasn’t fulfilled me in the way I hoped it might so that I stop thinking of its predecessor.

A tiny part of me still holds out hope that one day I’ll move something aside in my parent’s basement, and there it will be. Chances are if I did find it, it would be moldy or cracked or otherwise in a condition that it should be tossed. I half-hoped that writing this post would be cathartic in some way and I would stop thinking about it. I guess time will tell. Silly, isn’t it? What about you? Do you have a toy or item from your childhood that you’ve lost but still recall from time to time? Why do you think this is? Would love to hear from you.

Update: My mom read my blog last week and thinks she knows why this little purse meant so much to me. She said it was the first wallet I ever owned. I picked it out myself (I didn’t remember that) while we were on a family vacation in Florida. I put my few nickels and pennies in it, and was apparently very proud of it. She tells me that while on that trip we stopped for ice cream, and I insisted I was going to pay because I had “my own money in my own wallet”. Hmm, ice creams for a family of five in about 1972? What do you think, that had to cost between $5-10. I probably gave six cents and my dad slyly paid the remainder, because that’s what dads do. My mom thinks that this experience, having my own money for the first time, and keeping it in that little pink purse is what has given it such importance to me. And, I’m happy to say, I think knowing that may have helped me to now be able to leave the little pink purse in the past. Thanks mom!